Archive for December, 2007

Over MSN

Thursday, December 20th, 2007

B: she won’t be coming to our home anymore.
M: oh what happened?
B: childish thinking
M: huh? example…
B: if hungry eat, not I hungry then u eat.
M: and u r upset coz she cares for u?
B: childish thinking

 

Careless words
Unspoken actions
Unfulfilled expectations
I care that’s why I’m hurting

Can I be more than what I am now?

Wednesday, December 19th, 2007

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”

– Marianne Williamson

 

All of us have fears.

What do we do with our fears?

Do we allow it to manipulate us?

Do we flee from it and let it continue to haunt us?

Or do we face up to it and give our best shot?

So far, my way of handling is to stand up to it.

No matter how badly hurt I know that I may be, I will still want to face up to it.

It is the only way to be free of these shackles of uncertainty, of the deep unknown, of the deep-seated self doubts.

Can I really climb Everest?

It is this uncertainty that drives me to take on this challenge.

Can I be more than what I am now?

My Dameon

Friday, December 14th, 2007

A world where your soul resides out of your physical self.

What is the soul?

If it exists as a separate being, sharing similar traits yet able to have its own separate identity, what is the inner core of the physical being?

Is the soul a mirror of what we are capable of and what we truly feel of?

Is it what drives us to insanity, to perform actions that defy our common logic and moral being?

Is it the reigning force that cleanses all the bad thoughts and actions and allow us to grow into a better being?

As I strive to be a better person daily, I realise that when I look real deep inside, it scares me.

The struggle continues. 

My first full marathon

Sunday, December 2nd, 2007

My first full marathon

 

For someone who hated running and ran 20km once only before this, I am quite pleased that I managed to complete a full marathon today. If not for the free running pass, I don’t think that I will ever pay to run 42km..and I did it without walking throughout the distance. Which my friend said that I might have performed better if I walked a bit, so that the lactic acid can dissipate…..duh.

 

I enjoyed the first 30km, listening to the drum beats, the cheering by the motivators, the school band performance and feeling the cool breeze against my face while running through Shenton Way, Marina Bay and East Coast Park. Met a few colleagues and was pretty amused by the various reasons that people had for running. One of my favourite was from a very petite person: ‘Who says size matters?’ A true celebration of the human spirit.

 

The last 12km was a bit agonising as the strain on my right inner thigh worsened. Was damn worried that it will cramp up and I cannot run back to the finishing line. Along the way, I kept lathering on the deep heat rub cream and rehydrate at every water station to prevent it from cramping.

 

With the finishing line in sight, supporters cheering away and upbeat music blaring in the distance, my feet automatically picked up speed to race all the way back.

 

Pure satisfaction. 🙂